THE DEATH OF AMERICAN MOVIE MUSICALS
I know a few things that are completely, clearly true. No confusion. Take it home. The Pittsburgh Pirates will make the most bizarre decisions that a baseball organization can make. They will blame it on their smallish market and thus their inadequate revenue stream. This despite the fact that a recent report noted that the revenue from their lovely new stadium would net a fairly exceptional profit.
More to say on this subject, but it’s a separate post.
Also: Megan Fox will never win an Oscar. Go ahead and prove me wrong, you minx
Another certainty in life: any mention of movie musicals will be met with a derisive snort from my wife.
I don’t know if it’s because she’s Southern (You know us Northern/coastal elites and our effete tastes.) or if it is simply a product of my upbringing
My earliest memories of movie watching in my house was a lot of musicals. My parents watched the classics growing up so naturally my brothers and I watched them too.
So, in all honesty, what’s the disconnect? I know that there is a certain level of corny that people today aren’t used to so they don’t care for it
But Robert Preston made this hat work in “The Music Man.”
But Les Miserables and Phantom of the Opera, Miss Saigon, these are all relatively recent additions to the genre, and extraordinarily successful on stage. But they’ve only spawned one movie based upon them. And it was awful. (Crawford was waiting by the phone. You people are idiots.) Is it just that Hollywood doesn’t think they can sell them anymore? Or is it something worse? That the best ones, while bringing some funny, were also essentially cerebral? My Fair Lady won eight Oscars. Remade and brought out today would it make a sound in the theaters?
*As an aside, I would truly love to find the moron who thought that casting Audrey Hepburn over Julie Andrews—who had portrayed Eliza on the stage, and who could, you know, sing—was a splendid idea. I would like to tell him that he is an idiot.
What would make anybody think that a Cole Porter musical, perhaps modernized, wouldn’t wow at least a decent portion of the audience? Porter was way ahead of the curve when he wrote the lyrics for Anything Goes. Does this just not have an audience?
Is it that the ones produced recently are just completely awful
or that a Green Day “musical” is the most popular one to come along in a while? Is it *sigh* deemed “gay” and effectively stigmatized?
So alright, here’s the situation: a family that just happens to be talented singers is trapped in Austria which is effectively run by Nazi Germany. The last part of the film is their desperate attempt to escape across the border, saving their father from being conscripted in the Nazi army. Yeah. That’s “gay.”
Unless, of course, we’re talking about stuff like this:
It’s come to my attention that due to previous posts made to this blog that many people believe that my brother, Nate, author of the above, looks like this:
Nate actually looks nothing like that. He looks like this.