The Best Part of Having a Blog? Free Spam.

After you have a blog for a little while you come to grips with the fact that you will get far more spam comments than actual comments.

I bet you get hungry just looking at this picture.

You’ll get so many spam comments that you wish there was a different name for them, because it kind of ruins real spam for you.

I suggest scrapple in that it’s kind of like spam, only browner.

But then a funny thing kind of happens.  You start enjoying the spam more than the actual comments.  It’s an effect not at all dissimilar to the Stockholm Syndrome.

The Stockholm Syndrome is really difficult to encapsulate visually, so instead I take this opportunity to attach this image of Beaker being brutally interrogated by Statler and Waldorf. Muppets are far more violent than they used to be.

But some of the spam is enthralling and highly entertaining in a perverse kind of way.

Like the best .5% of Tosh.0. Of course, that hardly makes up for the other 99.5%…

Here, let me show you a recent sample of my spam:

There’s something somehow thrilling about being told by an eight-inch penis that they are impressed.  And when contactsex uses only German in their comment to you–clearly assuming that you are fluent in not only matters of passion, but also the sweet, dulcet tones of the mother-tongue–well how could you not be flattered?

Oh, contactsex, you had me at “Wie wii het.”

I can’t wait to see what eight inch penis has to say about this post.  I mean, if he thought that I “gotten hit the nail on the head” in my July 8th Sunday in Review post, he’ll be delighted how much more gotten nail head hitting I’ve done with this one!

The Dim Light, your home for subtle sexual metaphor.

And we’ll see if Cheap Dewalt is as good as his word about him being a “logo new reader.”  The proof is in the pudding, Cheap.

In addition to proof, the pudding may also contain strawberries.

As for Erotyczna Praca’s query about how we could keep up a correspondence, I can only say keep commenting, buddy.  Keep commenting.

But if you insist upon actual correspondence, please send your letters to the above address. Any envelopes arriving without Star Wars inspired stamps will remain unopened.

As will any envelopes containing actual spam.


2 comments on “The Best Part of Having a Blog? Free Spam.

  1. This post just brought a laugh-induced tear to my eye. Thanks, Craig.

  2. […] look at the sexy, sexy spam comments my site has received… Which are strangely […]

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