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Five items I’ve had to drop from my bucket list.

At this point most everyone knows what a bucket list is.

Not just a nearly unwatchable movie starring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson.

It’s a list of things you want to do/accomplish before you “kick the bucket.”

Whereas the Can List is the list of things you’ve wasted way too much time in your life doing already, like playing Kick the Can.

For most of us the sad truth is we will never be able to cross everything off our Bucket List.

Sure, Nicholson can, but what can’t Nicholson do?

My original list already has five entries that are now impossible for me to achieve.  I share them with you now.

5. Ride on a tandem bicycle with Ray Bradbury

Ray Bradbury, author, deceased and incapable of the motor function required to ride a tandem bicycle.

4.  Have a rap-off with Biggie Smalls.

Now I’ll never get my hands on that crown. Foiled again.

3.  Play linebacker for the New York Giants.

Still on the list: Painting myself blue and getting corrective lenses. It’s an eclectic list.

2.  Sport a white-man fro.

Male-pattern baldness will keep me from achieving this level of follicle majesty.

And finally, with great sadness I share the #1 item I have had to cross off my list.

1.  I will never be a Mountie.

Regrets, I have a few.

Thank you for sharing my sorrows.  To end on an up note, one last picture:

I bet my house will never float up to the sky on the wings of a million colorful balloons. (sigh)


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